I have put off making this post long enough. I’m just not excited about it. Its not even a weight thing. Its a motivation thing. Since my new diagnosis I have had a really hard time getting motivated about anything. I am easily overwhelmed by just about anything. I had a meltdown in Wal-mart this past weekend because they don’t label their GF products (seriously, Wal-mart you are a big enough company – please do your customers a favor and label!). I have easily justified making bad food choices. I have been drinking a lot of soda and justify that I have had so much other stuff taken away so I can have as much soda as I want. Or justify having a McFlurry for lunch (hey, its gluten-free!). I’m just so frustrated. I know I’m not making wise choices yet I continue down the same path. For some reason, I have just really taken this celiac diagnosis really hard. I think I am just so worried that this is not it. That there will be something else down the road and once again I’ll be disappointed.
I don’t think I’m depressed. Probably more anxious than depressed. I am seeking out local support groups. I will be meeting with a dietitian after vacation to help get me started. Two books came in the mail today (The G-Free Diet: A Gluten-Free Survival Guide by Elizabeth Hasselbeck (from The View) and The First Year: Celiac Disease and Living Gluten-Free: An Essential Guide for the Newly Diagnosed by Jules E. Dowlar Shepard). So I’m starting to get things together and I really really don’t want to have to go back on meds but I am also trying to start aware enough of my emotions to make the decision to do so if it means being a better wife and mother.
So needless to say, I haven’t made any process on my goals. I’ve got one week left so hopefully I can at least get them kick started in the next 7 days. Here is my info:
Last week’s weigh-in: 147.0
Today’s weigh-in: 147.4
Change: +.4
Overall Change: -17