I’m at home today on surgeon’s office orders. Yesterday I had a sudden resurgence of pain that was very similar to the pain that alerted me to my bowel obstruction. It wasn’t as constant as the day I went to the ER but when the pain hit it took your breath away.
I came home to rest hoping the pain would subside but when vomiting joined the party, I became very worried. I called my surgeon’s office first thing this morning and his assistant has me coming in first thing tomorrow (he was out of the office today) and my visit may likely include labs and/or a CAT scan. If things get worse, I am ordered to go to the ER but as of now, I’m ordered to rest and go on a liquids only diet.
It is so hard not to panic and jump to the worse case scenario. I’m trying to stay pulled together.
Thankfully yesterday afternoon I came across a post written by my wonderful friend C.C. which introduced me to Sara’s Story. Talk about a change in perspective. The video is about 30 minutes but it is worth every single minute. Turn off twitter. Turn off TV. Close my blog page even. Your life will be changed.
As I wiped the million tears, my first thought went to my blog tagline, “Choose hope in spite of chronic illness.” The past couple weeks I’ve had a hard time making that choice. I’ve tried to put on a good front but in my heart I know I have not been there. After listening to Sara’s story, I was totally convicted and have felt a new rededication to working each and every day to choose hope.
I have so many amazing things to be thankful for and I truly am blessed to have such an amazing family, friends, and community. Yes, chronic illness sucks. Plain and simple. However, I have so many other positive things that I can focus on.
Can I be thankful for a possible hiccup in my recovery if it renews my faith and hope? Absolutely.