I never thought I would be blogging at 3am but here I am! I couldn’t sleep and my tremors kept waking John up so I’m downstairs on the laptop. So far I have mopped thatI b showitchen floor and watched an episode of Blind Date. Does that show even come on during normal hours anymore?? Quality TV comes on at 3am let me tell you! Before attempting to fall asleep I read a chapter in Captivating that really touched my heart. It really went along with the post I wrote yesterday on the song “Fall.” The part that got me the most was knowing that God is there waiting to help me through these hard times but I’ve got to open the door to let Him. God is not pushy (how many times do you see Jesus chasing people down?) so He continues to knock until we let Him in. Many times we use this verse only in reference to salvation, which is true, but a believer must carry this verse with them throughout his or her Christian life. I have just felt God talking so much through reading, music, and even Dr H. Its time just to let go! I am looking forward to freedom in 2008!
Archives for:
December, 2007
Christmas 2007
Song sparked a new post!
On my way home from work I heard the song “Fall” by Clay Walker (which I LOVE and have heard many times before) and it sparked something. I know that the song is about a man-woman relationship but I was thinking of how it also speaks of the God-believer relationship. I just wonder what God is thinking during the times I put on a mask to show that I have everything together even though I’m dying inside. Maybe this is what He is saying:
Oh look there you go again
Puttin on that smile again
Even though I know you’ve had a bad day
Doin this doin that
Always puttin yourself last
A whole lotta give and not enuff take
But you can only be strong so long before you break
So..
Fall
Go on and fall apart
Fall into these arms of mine
I’ll catch you everytime you
Fall
Go on and lose it all
Every doubt every fear
Every worry every tear
I’m right here
Baby fall
Forget about the world tonight
All thats wrong and all thats right
Lay your head on my shoulder let it fade away
And if you wanna let go it’s okay
Fall
Go on and fall apart
Fall into these arms of mine
I’ll catch you everytime you
Fall
Go on and lose it all
Every doubt every fear
Every worry every tear
I’m right hereBaby fall
Hold on
Hold on
Hold on
To me
Fall
Go on and fall apart
Fall into these arms of mine
I’ll catch you everytime you
Fall
Go on and lose it all
Every doubt every fear
Every worry every tear
I’m right here
Baby fall
I just think that so many times when I am struggling to keep it together, God is there saying “Fall into my arms and I will catch you everytime.” In Him we are able to lose every doubt and fear as He has everything in control and He has prepared the way for us. I am so bad at giving up control. Even as a minister, I find it difficult to let go in certain areas. As far as jobs, money, house, etc I know He’s got that all in His plans but I really struggle with giving up my struggles with IF & Illness. I don’t know if its that I feel like I’ve caused it or what. But this song has reminded me that whenever I’m in over my head I need to fall.