>

Guest Health Activist: Meet Bola!

WeGo Health HAWMC 2013

For day 15 of the HAWMC, WeGo Health paired up participants to guests on each other’s blogs! I was very excited when I saw this prompt! I love meeting other bloggers and giving them a chance to share their story and teach us a thing or two about keeping hope in spite of illness here at A New Kind of Normal! I was paired up with Bola who blogs over at RealityNibs.com! You can also find her on Twitter, LinkedIn, and Facebook! Please give her a warm welcome and be sure to check out her blog! 

Last year at the end of the 2012 Blog Challenge, I told Wego Health that it would be nice to have a prompt which required each Health Activist to interact with other participants in some way. So, when I had the option of doing just that this year, I jumped at the opportunity. I even requested to be paired with a blogger who has fibromyalgia!

Bola of Reality Nibs

My name is Bola and I am on the verge of recovery from Chronic Fatigue Syndrome. CFS and Fibromyalgia are different manifestations of the same underlying condition (hypothalamic dysfunction) so I wanted to be paired with someone who was experiencing the other end of CFS/FMS. In addition to having this condition in common with Jamee, my situation was triggered by surgery for fibroid tumors which tend to occur for the same reasons as endometriosis and sometimes even occur together.

 

I really, really don’t like the fact that I’ve been unwell for eight years. But, facing this has brought many things into my life that I wouldn’t give up:

 

1. My intuition as well as my daily sense of my spiritual connection have been turned way up.

 

2. Despite my longstanding commitment to my emotional health, there are certain things I would probably have left under the rug if my health situation hadn’t made the stakes higher e.g. certain truths about my childhood.

 

3. Blogging!

 

I grew up in Britain and Nigeria then settled in the San Francisco Bay Area where I’ve had a marketing career in Silicon Valley. Unlike Jamee, I am single and I am looking forward to building a family at a level that I would never have known how to do before the earthquake that CFS brought into my life. Actually, I’m inspired by the way that Jamee has paid attention to her family life despite her health challenges.

 

I literally don’t know which direction I’m going to take tomorrow and I find the uncertainty challenging. But even as everything I expected to lean on has fallen away, love has come into my life in all sorts of stunning, unexpected ways. I’ve come to the conclusion that John Lennon really was right when he sang about love being all we need.

 

Thank you very much for having me here on A New Kind of Normal!

 

Thank you for sharing your story with us Bola! Be sure to check out her blog RealityNibs today where I will be sharing about my journey with endometriosis!

 photo jameesig_zpsde56006c.png

Changing the World Through Fashion

I am very excited to introduce today’s guest writer Emily from Scribbles From Emily! Emily passionately believes in the power of words, and hopes to encourage and inspire with the ones she writes. She blogs at Scribbles From Emily about finding the beauty in every day. I was completely inspired by her series on ethical fashion and when I was led to post about human trafficking and the way I shop, I knew for sure I had to ask her to guest post and share her knowledge! Be sure to stop by her blog and say hello! 

I believe that most of us want to change the world. On some level, we want to leave a mark on history. We want to be remembered as someone who truly made a difference. But when we look at the problems in the world, we’re quickly overwhelmed by the magnitude of the issues, issues like the orphan crisis, poverty, and human trafficking. Change looks completely impossible for all but the activist types, those people who have given their lives to working in the slums of Africa or the Amazon jungle. After all, how much can ordinary woman with things like family, jobs, and busy schedules do?

The first time I heard of human trafficking, also known as modern day slavery, I was in high school, researching for an essay about “problems in our world.” Unlike I had previous thought, slavery was alive and well. In fact, there are more slaves today than at any time in history. Some estimate the number of those enslaved is around 27,000,000. That includes forced labor, sex slavery, bonded labor, involuntary domestic servitude, forced child labor, child soldiers, and child sex trafficking.

For years, I felt powerless to help. Then last fall, through God working on my heart, I began becoming a conscious consumer, thinking about what and how much I buy, and whom I buy from. I realized that through my ignorance, I was unknowingly supporting companies who make their money by exploiting those most vulnerable through forced labor, child labor, debt bondage, and other means of manipulation.  By supplying demand, I was contributing to the system that sustains the abhorrent practice of human slavery.

I also discovered something that surprised me: it’s not that hard to make a difference.

You see, unlike the fashions of the past that evolved slowly, today’s industry revolves around “fast fashion,” frequently changing styles that consumers are encouraged to purchase every season. Because the styles are constantly changing, companies seek to manufacture their clothing for less. As a result, they source their materials and labor overseas, often in questionable circumstances.

However, there are a few companies bucking the industry trends. According to an exhibit at the Victoria and Albert Museum, “Ethical Fashion aims to address the problems it sees with the way the fashion industry currently operates, such as exploitative labor, environmental damage, the use of hazardous chemicals, waste, and animal cruelty.” There are six genres of ethically made clothing that address those specific issues:

  • Vegan: not made with any animal products, such as leather
  • Ethically produced: includes fair trade and organic certifications, clothing made with respect for people and the environment
  • Craft/Artisan: skillfully handmade products
  • Custom: made-to-order, “slow” fashion
  • Recycled: made from existing materials, often former garments reworked into new ones
  • Vintage/Second hand: using what’s already in the system, and supporting local communities and businesses

 

By shopping with ethical fashion companies, every dollar spent sends a message. A vote, if you will, for change. When we don’t buy what they’re selling, it speaks loud and clear that unethical sourcing or manufacturing is not ok, and when we give our business to ethical companies, women are able to escape prostitution, parents can send their kids to school, and local economies improve.

Here’s four ways you can make a difference with your shopping and support ethical fashion: 

Buy Fair Trade. You might have heard of fair trade coffee or chocolate before, but did you know that clothing, textiles, etcetera can also be fair trade certified? According to Fair Trade USA, “Fair Trade goods are just that. Fair. From far-away farms to your shopping cart, products that bear our logo come from farmers and workers who are justly compensated. We help farmers in developing countries build sustainable businesses that positively influence their communities. We’re a nonprofit, but we don’t do charity. Instead, we teach disadvantaged communities how to use the free market to their advantage. With Fair Trade USA, the money you spend on day-to-day goods can improve an entire community’s day-to-day lives.”

How do you know if an item is fair trade certified? It should have the fair trade logo on it somewhere, or on their company website.

Shopping to Change the World

Buy Better. Not all companies that want to pay fair wages can afford the certification process, or want to deal with the lengthy process it requires. Although these companies aren’t fair trade certified, they still follow ethical practices by revealing their sources and following up with suppliers and manufacturers.

An invaluable tool to compare brands is the Free2Work app and website. As part of the Not For Sale organization, Free2Work evaluates brands based on several criteria and given a letter grade. Practically speaking, this makes it easy to pick better options. I can’t afford to replace my closet overnight, and pitching all clothing I’ve already bought doesn’t really help anyone. But, by using the Free2Work website, I’ve been able to choose better options going forward.

Maybe you can’t afford a pair of $100 jeans from PrAna. Instead of buying a $20 pair from Walmart, with a Free2Work grade of  D+, you could buy one from Old Navy, which has a solid grade of B. Or, you get a pair of PrAna jeans for less using the next tip.

Fair Trade Shopping - Nooday Artisans

Photo – Noonday Collections 

Buy Thrift and Used. Shopping clothing that’s already out in the system is a form of recycling. Plus, many thrift stores, like Goodwill and Savers, give back to their local communities, so it’s a win-win! You could also host a closet swap with your friends, and shop each other’s unwanted clothes. If shopping on eBay or thrift stores intimidates you, there’s loads of excellent information on the subject that will give you the confidence to give it a try. Here’s a round up post of some of my favorite thrifting tutorials from around the web.

 

Buy Less to Buy Better. Yes, it’s on sale, and it’s cute. But do I really need it? After my experiment of wearing only ten items for an entire month, I realized that I “need” a lot less than I thought! By cutting down on impulse buys, now I can afford those pricier fair trade items.

fair trade shopping

Photo – Emily of Scribbles from Emily

I know I’ve just given you a dump truck of information, but if you’d like to learn more, I recommend the resources from Stop Traffick Fashion, What Is Human Trafficking? And What Is Ethical Fashion? Setting captives free really can be as simple as changing your shopping habits.

Have you heard of human trafficking or ethical fashion before? If you have any questions, ask away in the comments below!

Chronic Illness & Marriage: The Importance of Communication

I am so glad to be introducing you to our first guest writer of the series, Rachel! We were able to meet through the wonderful world of Twitter and I am so glad that our paths were able to cross! She is a fabulous person and a wonderful supporter! Be sure to visit her blog and say hello after reading today’s post!

The importance of communication in marraigesource

First off, let me introduce myself. My name is Rachel. I have been married to my wonderful husband for close to four and a half years. I have Crohn’s Disease. I was diagnosed when I was seventeen. I am now twenty-four. My husband and I are also dealing with infertility. You can read my blog at www.rachelsgettingthere.com . I mostly blog about infertility, but this post isn’t about my infertility. It is about the importance of healthy communication in my marriage, specifically as it pertains to my chronic illness.

As I said, I was diagnosed at seventeen, so my husband knew what he was getting himself into when he married me. When we first started dating, he researched Crohn’s Disease and read everything he could find about the treatments and the prognosis. I think that him knowing about my illness when we married was definitely a plus because he sort of knew what to expect.

 

We talked about a lot of things before we got married. We set rules for communication. Communication has always been very important in our relationship. We have a policy in our marriage that we call ‘The No Ugliness Policy.’ It applies to all areas of our marriage. The No Ugliness Policy is an agreement not to say or do anything intentionally hurtful during any disagreement, argument, or discussion. If one of us breaks the policy we apologize immediately. You should never set out to hurt the person that you love. With Crohn’s, like all other areas of our marriage, we listen to each other and we keep it kind and constructive.

 

My husband was raised in a household where you didn’t go to the doctor unless something was bleeding profusely and/or was life threatening. If it wasn’t going to kill you, you had to suck it up and go on with your day. My husband is still that way. He once went on a business trip while sick with pneumonia! Obviously, with a chronic illness ‘sucking it up’ just doesn’t work all of the time. Sometimes I have to rest to avoid getting sicker. If I am in an active flare I have no choice but to rest. If I start having symptoms of a flare I have to go to the doctor immediately before it gets bad. It took my husband a while to get used to this. We had to talk about the importance of preventative care (rest, stress reduction, regular doctors appointments), we had to weigh the benefits and risks of all of my treatment options, and at times we have had to make decisions that were financially hard on us because of my health.

 

The secret to communication isn’t really a secret at all. You have to listen to your partner as much as you talk. It sounds simple, but it isn’t. Listening means keeping your mind open to the possibility that you might be wrong. You have to make compromises. For example, my husband’s mother lives very far from us. A few years ago she was going to be just one state over visiting his brother a couple of weeks after I got out of the hospital due to a flare-up. I felt terrible, but my husband doesn’t get to see his mom that often. It would have been selfish of me to not go with him to see his mom. It was hard and I crashed the next day, but I went. My husband has also had to adjust to the fact that when we do something that is physically taxing for me (like a trip or even family get-togethers) I have to crash afterward. Through communication he has learned that chronic pain is exhausting and I can’t just push through it all the time.

 

My husband is a professional fixer. He is a process improvement engineer to be exact. He has had to learn that no matter how much he wants to, he can’t fix my Crohn’s Disease. I’ve had to learn that he is going to try to fix it for me anyway. It’s his nature. It’s his way of showing that he loves me, but I wouldn’t know that if we didn’t communicate about it. If I didn’t know why he tries so hard to ‘fix’ me I would think that he was angry at me, when he is actually just angry at an illness that he can’t fix for me.

 

When one spouse has a chronic illness it definitely complicates a marriage, but it doesn’t have to make it worse. It can make it better. Being completely open with my husband about how I’m feeling has at times been uncomfortable for me, but the results have been so worth it. I get mad sometimes that I have to deal with Crohn’s disease while all the other people my age are so healthy. My husband just holds me and lets me cry when I’m mad. He has helped me make important decisions about my treatment when I’ve been too upset to really make the best decision myself. He truly is my partner. I have Crohn’s, but in a way, so does he. I’ve got to say, I sure am glad that I get to face it with an ally who loves me and supports me. I wouldn’t have that if we weren’t so open and honest about our thoughts and feelings.

© 2010-2013 A New Kind of Normal All Rights Reserved -- Copyright notice by Blog Copyright