I was really hoping today would be a more positive day than yesterday. I started out yesterday morning feeling very positive but somewhere around mid-morning hormones kicked in and I felt very emotional. Today I am still slightly emotional but I’ve got some killer cramps so its really hard to be positive. I was so hoping that one IUI would be the trick but now I’m not so sure. God please grant me some peace & comfort!


Monday Morning

It’s Monday again so its back to the daily grind at work. I was really wanting to blog this weekend but our home computer is possessed. It is thankfully going to the “doctor” today so hopefully it will be back to running normal again soon! I had a very good weekend and had a lot of time to relax and think. I spent Saturday afternoon alone shopping and got a lot of thinking done. I think God has finally really begun to give me a peace that I can’t explain. Sure I still have my moments where I get sad or frustrated but I really have been able to lean on Him to remain peaceful while also staying hopeful. Today I am officially 6 dpiui and I have a feeling that the next week will be the hardest! AF will be due a week from tomorrow but Dr. H wants me to wait until next Friday to test. While I understand her reasoning, it will drive me crazy! But John has also told me I can’t test until then either! Oh well! God please give me strength! LOL! I’m feeling ok today. I just feel very bloated 🙁 Thank goodness for jackets to cover my tummy! I hope its for a good reason 🙂


Never Let Go

Matt Redman – You Never Let Go
Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death
Your perfect love is casting out fear
And even when I’m caught in the middle of the storms of this life
I won’t turn back I know You are near
And I will fear no evil
For my God is with me
And if my God is with me
Whom then shall I fear?
Whom then shall I fear?
Chorus: Oh no, You never let go
Through the calm and through the storm
Oh no, You never let go
In every high and every low
Oh no, You never let go
Lord, You never let go of me
And I can see a light that is coming for the heart that holds on
A glorious light beyond all compare
And there will be an end to these troubles
But until that day comes
We’ll live to know You here on the earth
Yes, I can see a light that is coming for the heart that holds on
And there will be an end to these troubles
But until that day comes
Still I will praise You, still I will praise You
It is songs like this that help me keep going even when the future seems so out of reach. I do not know how people can get through disease or infertility without God’s strength. I know that I could not make it. I would be one cold and bitter person I can tell you that much. But it is God’s grace and unfailing love that provide me with peace to take each day as it comes as I know that He will never let go of me.